Sorry I have not been on line much. Last Saturday at work I put out so much energy I was unable to function after I got relieved I stumbled down the hall to the break room and simply collapsed into a chair and put my head on the table and went out.
Ron came in and tried to tall to me. he then told me to go clock out and he would meet me on the fourth floor where he clocks out. What I did not know is he went to the resource nurses in their office on the fourth floor and told them I couldn’t come to work on Sunday. They do the staffing, so they agreed to call me off the next morning. I did not know this until we got home and if I could have worked up the energy I would have been upset and steamed and insisted on going to work in the morning. In the am after I got showered I got the call to stay home. Later I found out why.
Thursday we had all heck break out. We had a full unit and had to close it. Suddenly and frantically while still doing everything else. Most of our PT’s went to the floor, but several went to a small stand by unit that normally Ron runs. He got it opened and I ran my butt off , doing my normal stuff, doing orders and now had to move out a whole unit, some to floors and some to Ron.
There were problems but we overcame. Not the point of the post. After I got the last one moved I guess I looked really bad. I was very pale and fell several times. I wanted to go down to Ron’s unit and help him but my charge made me sit in my chair…just sit there…Then when the resource nurse showed up I again tried to get into the action but she also made me sit at my desk in an empty unit. What I did not know was I looked like heck…very pale, fast ragged breathing, hardly able to stand…Guess I was going down fast, I had used the last of my reserves. So I spent a hour and a half resting in an empty unit “taking care of things here”.
I have spent two days doing nothing but resting and reading books that Randy got me interested in. I laid in bed sleeping or just being until my back ached too bad and then sat in my desk chair with Milo in my lap…Milo has hardly left me. he can be a bed hog though.
I have not felt up to even being on my computer. I have not gone to blogs, read or written email and I have not even read my normal daily cartoons. I have no energy or interest sadly. I do know management feels I did a great job under very difficult because they gave Ron a meal ticket to give to me and told him how well I did.
I hope tomorrow to get to my email, do some more posts, and go to all the wonderful web sites of those of you out there I love, Randy’s, Angel’s, Miles new one, and a few other. For tonight I will simply post this and read some more. Ron and James are cooking me a steak and bake potato supper. I am already to just go back to sleep. Ron wants me to stop working, thinks I have aged a lot in the last year and half. I admit I am tired, but I will work through it, I like what I do..
Ron told me the nurses stood up for me at a recent meeting where they tried to put more duties on me. They said no way I could possibly do more or handle any more work. Management tried to say the nurses had Secretary’s to help them do the extra job and the nurse rebelled and said “Scottie can’t possible do any more than he does and it wont work. No one could do all that and this also. “
Ron thinks my body wont handle many more years of this. I have several offices asking me for resumes and I have given one office my information on the understanding I will work for them only when not in my loved SICU. Ron was very unhappy I did so, he thinks I can’t work extra days. But Christmas is coming , everything is more expensive and I want Ron and James to have a good Christmas.
I can do it, I am not that old or run down. I just need some rest, some respite from my pain. I guess it is love that keeps me going.
My best and most wonderful loving thoughts to each of you. Hugs