Scotties Toy Box

March 9, 2019

C.W. McCall – Wolf Creek Pass

Filed under: Funny Stuff, Music and Videos, News, Song, Songs and Music — Scottie @ 06:50

Needed something funny, hope you enjoy.  Hugs

 

Me an Earl was haulin’ chickens
ona Flat bed outta’ Wiggins
And we ‘as spent all night
on the uphill side
of 37 miles o’ hell
called Wolf Creek Pass… Which is up on the Great Divide.
We was sittin’ there suckin’ toothpicks
Drinkin’ Nehis an’ onion soup mix,
An’ I says Earl, let’s mail a card to mother
and send them chickens on down t’other side,
Yeah let’s giv’em a ride.

Chorus- Wolf Creek Pass
way up on the Great Divide
Truckin’ on down the other side.

Well Earl put down his bottle
An’ mashed his foot down on the throttle
Then a couple of boobs
and a thousand cubes
of a 1948 peterbuilt screamed t’ life.
We woke up the chickens.
We roared on off of that shoulder
sprayin’ pinecones, rocks, and boulders,
and put 400 head
of them Rhode Island Red
and a couple of burned out roosters on the line.
Look out below cuz here we go.

Chorus

Well we commenced to truckin’
and them hens commenced to cluckin’.
Then Earl took out a match,
scratched his pants
and lit up the unused half of a dollar cigar
and took a puff, ‘says
My ain’t this pertty up here.
I says Earl this hill can spill us,
you better slow down,
you gonna’ kill us.
Just make one mistake
an’ it’s the pearly gates
for them 85 crates o’ USDA approved cluckers.
You wanna’ hit second?

Chorus

Well Earl grabed onto the shifter
and stabbed her into fifth gear.
Then the chromium-plated
fully illuminated
genuine accessory shift knob
come right off in his hand.
I says you wanna screw that thing back on Earl?
Well he was tryin to thread it on there
when the fire fell off of his cigar
and dropped on down
sorta rolled around
and lit the cuff of Earls pants
an’ burned a hole in his sock.
Yeah sorta set him right on fire.
Well I looked on outta the window
an’ started countin’ phone poles
goin’ by at the rate of 4 to the 7th power.
Well I put 2 and 2 together
and added 12 an’ carried 5,
come up with 22,000 telephone poles an hour.
I looked at Earl and his eyes was wide
His lip was curled and his leg was fried
and his hand was froze to the wheel
like a tongue to a sled in the middle of a blizzard.
I says Earl I’m not the type to complain
but the time has come for me to explain
that you don’t apply some brake real soon,
their gonna’ have to pick us up with a stick and a spoon.
Well Earl rared back, cocked his leg,
stepped down as hard as he could on the brake,
pedal went clear to the floor
‘ stayed right there on the floor.
Said it was kinda like steppin’ on a plum.
Well from there on down it just wasn’t real pertty,
it was hairpin county and switchback city.
One of ’em looked like a can full of worms,
another one looked like malaria germs.
Right in the middle of the whole damn show
was a real nice tunnel now wouldn’t you know.
The sign said clearance to the 12 foot line
but them chickens was stacked to 13-9.
Well we shot that tunnel at a hundred and ten
like gas throuugh a funnel and eggs through a hen.
We took that top row of chickens off slicker than scum off a Louisiana swamp.
Went down an’ around an’ around an’ down
we ran outta ground at the edge of town
and bashed into the side of the feed store
in downtown Pagosa Springs.

Chrous
(repeat)

 

2 Comments »

  1. “C.W. McCall” cracks me up. I remember when “Convoy” came out during the big fad for CB radios. I understand that “C.W McCall” was more of a fictional character, created by a singer who wrote the lyrics and the music was written by Chip Davis, who is much better known as the founder of Mannheim Steamroller. I’ve been told a story that on at least one tour Mannheim Steamroller was the opening act for McCall. The audience who had come to hear McCall was mystified and underwhelmed by this new-agey classical stuff. But it was all the same musicians who then came back on and played the McCall concert. That may not be a true story, but it’s a good story, anyway!

    Liked by 1 person

    Comment by Ubi Dubium — March 10, 2019 @ 17:04

    • Hello Ubi. CW McCall’s real name is William Dale Fries, Jr. From what I could find your story is correct.

      There he concocted, with singer/lyricist Bill Fries, a country music enterprise called C.W. McCall that scored a major ’70s “trucking” hit called Convoy. “Quite a bit of the original Mannheim band was the same as the band for C.W. McCall,” Davis said.Nov 11, 2011

      “They were the same players I used in my jingle sessions. So when C.W. McCall took off as a country artist, these were the only players I knew of to draw on.

      “C.W. McCall had to do this concert one time when the front act, some other country artist, didn’t show. So we put on tails and coats over our blue jeans and tennis shoes and went out as Mannheim Steamroller for the first half of the show and came back in blue jean jackets for the second half as C.W. McCall. The audience was stunned. You saw a lot of blank looks on their faces.”

      https://www.kentucky.com/entertainment/music-news-reviews/article44136048.html

      Hugs

      Liked by 1 person

      Comment by Scottie — March 10, 2019 @ 17:18


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