Scotties Toy Box

September 24, 2019

Bill Withers – Lean On Me

I spent about 2 hours today crying, breath ceasing red faced tears running down my face.  I hurt.  I hurt from the memories I have.  I can not change them, the past is what it is.  I am very lucky I do have an out.  I could have gone to the bedroom and gotten Ron.  I have a wonderful adoptive brother, something I never had during my  childhood when I was being abused,  he works long hard hours but he keeps his phone on for me even when he gets his few hours of sleep.  When I was so depressed and upset back in 2014 /2015 I was back to self harming my self ( something I still want to do some days ) he would call me every 4 to 8 hours to make sure I was OK.  That is family .  Something I never had growing up.  One of the persons I grew up with use to laugh at me being a 5  / 6 year old sitting alone on a embankment asking “why it was always me”.   She never released what she thought was funny was really an indictment of what she and others were doing to me.  I was already being sexually abused and beaten.  “Why was it always me”, asks a five / six year old?  That should have raised questions everywhere.  When in 1st grade the school pressed charges of child abuse ( I have written of this before ) the people I lived with took me out of school, then moved to a different state, then moved a gain in a few months to another town in a first state.  This was in the 1960’s.  There was no follow up, even though I had been taken to the local hospital and examined.   It was if no questions had been raised, and the abuse continued.  So today  the memories make me cry.  Hugs

Bill Withers – Lean On Me

2 Comments »

  1. Hello my brother;
    Always do my best to be there for you, much like the song says, and you have always been there for me.

    hugs and love;
    randy

    Liked by 1 person

    Comment by Randy — September 24, 2019 @ 18:00

    • Hello Brother. Sorry to have gotten you out of bed. Now go get some sleep, you have to work tonight. Loves as always. Hugs

      Like

      Comment by Scottie — September 24, 2019 @ 18:11


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