Scotties Toy Box

February 9, 2017

To do or not to do

Before I start my day of reading blogs and answering emails, I wish to address an issue that has me somewhat confused.  On several blogs I follow there has been a running discussion about the progressive left and the regressive left.   I did not realize this was a major topic of discussion as I assumed the left was simply the party that wanted the best things for people.  Yes I knew there was some disagreement on how to pay for the many programs the people on the left felt were needed, however I did not realize how big a divide the issues have become.

I started noticing this about the time the white supremacist Spencer was punched in the face.  The debate was on if the people on the political left should punch people they did not like in the face.  I figured this was so simple a question that no one would need a second guess.   However there was an outcry with the different sides throwing out terms like SJW and SNOWFLAKE with the occasional NAZI.  Now I did not realize how much division the sjw and snowflake labels caused.   I have to admit I am some what hazy on just what is a social justice warrior and I have no desire to needlessly harm others if they are in a sensitive or hurt possition.   I care about people.   Now I will address snowflake more in a minute.

I once was accused of being a sjw and I felt honored.  I did not know the term and it took some people I really trust to inform me that the term was not used as a complement but an insult.  I wondered why?  I thought fighting for others who were maybe disadvantaged and unable to stand up for themselves was an  honorable thing.  The term brought to my mind some hero trying to make things better, defending the weak and protecting those who couldn’t protect themselves.  I guess others felt my idea was simplistic and wrong.

I guess the way people use the term SJW is someone tilting at windmills and creating a problem where one doesn’t exist.  I am still not sure as to what a sjw really is.  I get the feeling others think sjws inject themselves into areas that they are not needed or wanted, finding a problem where none exist.  It seems to comes with the idea that sjws are trying to force a version of restrictive social rules on to everyone even if the others around them don’t wish the restrictions.   That seems to me the opposite of what a social justice warrior should be. If this is what is meant then they need to pick a better term to use.   They are social rules dictator  or socially repressive enforcers.  I still have issues with the meanings of these things.  I still feel I am what I term a fighter for others and someone who works for and wants a better social structure.

Now the term snowflake is harder for me.  I feel in some ways snowflakes have two different categories.   The term some people use is a person who is spoiled and want the world to accommodate them unfairly.  A person who is unreasonable about insisting only their view of the world is allowed.   The other version is a person who is harmed, fragile, needing help, suffering from a past event.  I think of snowflakes as the second group.  I think of snowflakes as bunnies in a world of bigger predators who will hurt them and they have no defence.   I would defend those in the second group.  Let me explain why.  As some people know I am a survivor of long time abuse.  Sexual, physical, emotional.  I prefer not to talk about it, I hid it for most of my life until I couldn’t hide it anymore.  I am only now learning how to confront it and still dislike talking about it.  But if you go back in time on my blog you will find that years ago a psychologist treated me for issues surrounding the abuse , how it was affect my daily life and how I was dealing with it.  The psychologist concluded I was a bunny in temperament.      In his view I was not able to defend myself and needed others to do that for me.  It was weird because I was quite able to defend others and I had no problem using force to protect those who needed protecting.   However I never once asked the world to change for me.  I never asked for things that triggered me to be taken off the web, banned from the social environment or taken off any media.  I have talked before about things that trigger me, a video or show about child abuse will send me into a  really bad place where I have to deal with the memories that never seem to quite go away.  I have started to read books and been triggered into deep depressions and emotional vortex that try to destroy me.  Here is an example.  When I first started to read the Harry Potter books I had a horrible time with the beginnings of most of the books.  It was triggering to have a small boy unable to defend himself treated that way.  Even now it is very upsetting to me.  I can’t watch those parts of the movies.  I forced myself on first reading the books to quickly get through those pages while making sure to be in a safe space and to have outs around me.  I can not reread those pages now that I know what is there and I can’t watch those parts of movies.    However I do not expect the books or movies to be changed to take those parts out.  I do not want the rest of the world who feel this adds to the richness of the story to have to lose that just for me.  In this case the good of the one is not more important than the good of the many.  I have a problem, I can find ways to deal with it and I have.   I hope I have explained well enough what I mean by snowflake and how I do think we should help people with real problems while asking people who simply want the world to accommodate only them to please let the world live their lives also.   If not please tell me and I will try to reword it.  Thanks.

I would like to step back and address one thing at this time.   There has been much talk of trigger warnings.  I think they are both a good thing for some people while at the same time I think they should not be required or mandated.  Here is my reasoning.   It is nice for me to know if a story I am about to read or watch will show sexual or physical abuse.  I can take actions from preparing myself to see it, deal with it, or to avoid the material all together.   However just because you get a warning it doesn’t mean you have real understanding of what will be shown or described.  Plus if you miss the warning it won’t do you any good anyway.  For an example my son had starting to watch a show on the TV.  I came into the living room and decided to watch it with him.  He never thought it out and I did not know what was coming.  The program showed in graphic detail the rape and sexual abuse of a child.  They just splashed it out on screen.  My son realized I was in the room and tried to get the thing off the TV.  He was too late.  I was freaking out.  I had a heck of a time after.  But a lot of people would freak with that type of material thrown at them while they are unprepared.  It was what the show people wanted for a response.   I just get more affected than others who were not abused would.  A warning wouldn’t have done me any good nor did my son know that would be in the show to warn me.  So I think these trigger warnings have a place in our society but I don’t think they should be mandatory nor depended on to solve all triggering problems.

Let me sum this long post up by returning to what we started with, the punching of some one based on their ideas.  I wouldn’t think this needed debate.  The answer is no, you shouldn’t ever punch or use violence against someone for their thoughts or positions.   No matter how much you disagree or think what they are endorsing is disgusting as long as it is an idea and not an action you can not, you should not, use force on another person.  Yes white supremacist and fascist ideas are repugnant, but as long as they are simply ideas and not actions then no you can’t punch them.   Here is why.  If I can punch someone or hurt someone who has ideas I dislike and think horrible, that gives others who think what I believe and do is horrible and they dislike it, to punch me.   IF a white nationalist can be punched for being that, then they can punch gay or non-white people as they think the same things about them.  It simply lets violence loose on everyone and ends all attempts to move the society to a more progressive place.  Also it forces others to defend the ones who got punched and I hate to have to defend a racist bigot.

Thank you.  Hugs

February 6, 2017

84 Lumber Super Bowl Commercial – The Entire Journey – YouTube

Filed under: Family, History, Ideas, My Life and Rants, opinion, Political, Questions, Race — Scottie @ 11:58

Good morning.  I overslept and I am just getting started.  I really need the sleep.  This was a great video to watch first thing. It is uplifting and ends in hope.  I like hope.  I guess I am a dreamer because I look forward to a day when people mean more than boarders.  I had often hoped that the three major states in the continent would join, becoming simply one.  Canada, the US, and Mexico joined as one people.  I know it will take time.  I know people will want to keep parts of their own culture and will want respect for their heritage.  We have vastly different cultures in our own country and until recently we managed to get along.  We managed to respect each other.  We all want a future like in Star Trek.  However to get there means works.  It means give and take.  It also means reining in religions and any ideology that seeks to dominate everyone else.  I recently watched a religious leader say they needed FADA because they should be able to have their faith in the public square.    They can already do that.  They can pray in public, they can preach in public, they can gather in public.   What they can’t do it force others to do that with them.  They can’t force others to pray in public, to wear what they insist on, to listen to their preachers, to gather in their meetings.   That is the thing they want.  To force others to do as they do.  That is wrong.  They are not being persecuted, they want to persecute.  The world of peace if out there.  It can be ours if we learn to respect others.  To let other be if it is not hurting us.  To kill someone because you are worried about their soul yet willing to destroy their body, is a weird concept.  So worship what you want, celebrate the culture you want, but live in harmony with others, respect the same things in others you demand for yourself.   Hugs

February 3, 2017

Got sick twice

Filed under: Family, Harm, Health, My Life and Rants — Scottie @ 01:14

This is not the post I had planned to write.   Infact I was planning to write a cute cat post complete with the pictures.   However life decided I should tell you about the other important activities I had today.   To tell the story correctly I need to go back to Wednesday morning, then back almost two years ago.   

Wednesday morning:  Ron came home from working two 12 hour night shifts in a row.  He had gotten a bonus a month ago and it was saved in the account.  It was substantial. He was saving it for new appliances for our new kitchen.  I felt he should get something for himself though.   He never buys anything really for himself, except needed clothing.   Yet he is so generous with me and even others who need things.   

We got married on 1-12-2015.  An incredible grand thing.  As ill as I had become I was floating in heaven.     So Ron announced in mid February he wanted to get me a new phone.   I felt it was a good time to mention to him I would like a new IPad also.  We went to our phone provider where a really nice cute gay young man informed us quietly that if we waited until the end of March we could get both of these things at a much reduced sale price.  With the sale we could get an Ipad and the phone for what the phone would cost.   So we went home and Ron thought.   My birthday was in mid march.  He knew I used my pad a lot, I did not go anywhere without it.   My IPad was a wi-fi only 16 gb.  Ron felt I needed more as I used it all the time, and when no wi-fi was available I would go through my phone as a hot spot.  We really did not research the pads or the phone, we just felt what we wanted.  So at the end of March we went and got me an IPhone 6 Plus and an IPad Air 2 64 GB air and wi-fi capable.   Both cost extra as they were top of their respective lines.  We really did not think it through as we have everything in the clouds and so I did not need the higher storage amount.  Plus as my new phone had a hot spot I did not have to pay extra for like my old phone so I did not need the air part.  It would have cost us half the amount.  But Ron had saved and he wanted me to have something really nice.  In the almost 2 years I have had them I have loved both immensely.   Like I said I took both with me anywhere I went.  I gave Ron my old IPad.  I had been trying for years to get him to get an Ipad, but he refused saying he had no need for one and wouldn’t use it.   Then when he had my old one he started to use it and fell in love with the IPad.  He really used it a lot for someone who did not want one.  I tried hard to talk him into getting a new one but he always refused.  I thought the big price tag of mine was bothering him and I was correct.  I told him we could get him one that was only what we needed for $400.   He still wouldn’t budge, he was going to use the money for things we needed.  Well over the weekend I reminded him he couldn’t get the updates on the old pad and that he used it for his banking and bill paying.   That plus all the other reasons I gave him worked.  He agreed to go to the local apple store and get an IPad.   

Fast forward to last Wednesday.   He came home after stopping to get me soda, and asked me to wake him at 1 and we would go get his new IPad.  We went to the store and bought him a new IPad Air 2.  We also got him a really great case with a built in keyboard.  It snaps in and has a magnetic strip to lock the pad into position and charges from the IPad through the magnetic lock.  While we were there I asked him if I could have one also.  Ron said he would like to take his home and check it out first.  I said OK as I felt he was stressed out over spending over $500 on himself.  Well that night we both decided the keyboard was grand and we would go out the next day and get me one.  The one Ron got was a Logitech Canvas for $99.  So I looked online and found a local store that had a logitech Keyboard case for that price.  We thought it was the same so we went right out and bought it.  It was not the same at all.  It did not snap in, it slipped out of the case if not kept closed or locked, it did not charge from the Ipad but had to be plugged in.  I was almost in tears.  Ron said not to worry we would get up early Thursday morning and go to the Apple store and get the correct one.  Ron said that if I could handle it we also would go to several other stores to get things I wanted that we had not had time to go to yet.  So we got up and rushed down to the Apple store.  We went in and we couldn’t find the keyboard case at all.  They had them for all other makes except the Air 2.  We asked a worker and he said that they did not sell them at the store anymore but he checked for us and they were sold online at the online Apple Store.  I said OK.  We left planning to go home and look them up and buy one.

We went to the next store I wanted to go to.  I did suggest we go eat as neither of us had eaten breakfast.  However Ron was bent on getting me to these stores and pushed on.  I was feeling more poorly as we walked the store.  I was starting to get nauseous, confused, and  dizzy.  Then as we started to go to the registers I got really ill.  By the time we were being cashed out I was stumbling, sweating profusely, and thought I would pass out.  The cashier looked at me and got worried and asked if I was OK, I said no.  Ron looked up and got worried, I was pale white.  Ron knew instantly what had happened.  He took charge.  He told her I was diabetic and my sugar had crashed.  I had never had it happen this fast.  I was going to vomit any second, and started to sit down on the floor.  Ron reached over and grabbed a bag of sugar candies and ripped it open and had me eat a couple and then suck on a third one.   By the time we had finished checking out I was feel well enough I did not feel like I would fall or was going to vomit.  By the time we got to the car I was feel well again.  I have had low and high blood sugar before, but never has it happened in what seemed so fast a time frame.  I had been slowly feeling worse.  But the last few minutes I went from uncomfortable to really sick fast.  Too fast for me to do anything to help my self.   So Ron decided to take us for food right away as my sugar was going to rebound, and roller coaster from low to high back to low and repeat. 

So we stopped at a local chain restaurant ( Bob Evans ) and then came home.  I had to go to bed as now my sugar was going too high, making me very drowsy.  Ron went to bed with me as he had not slept much the night before and he is use to being up all night and sleeping during the day.  I had been up all night as I have been having trouble sleeping lately. However after laying there for hours I got up as my pain wouldn’t let me sleep.  Ron kept sleeping.  After a short time up at the computer I got feeling ill again.  Suddenly with only seconds warning I was projectile vomiting.  I was trying to turn to the left away from the desk, so I got the monitor in front of me then the desk and everything on it to the left, and then the floor, door to the office and myself.  I quickly cleaned off the monitor and then went to the bedroom to change.  I was pretty shaken and weak.  I was breathing bad among other signs something was wrong.   Ron woke up as I tried to change and asked what was wrong.  I told him and he got up and as I changed he cleaned up the entire office and my desk.  I came back and offered to help but he did the entire thing.  Yes he is grand and wonderful.  

So that was my day.  I got nothing done.  I did not get my keyboard, I did not get it ordered online as we had planned leaving the Apple Store.  I did not get my emails read.  I did not read the blogs of the many people I love online, I also did not get to read any comments on blogs I had read and commented on.   I did get to a few tweets and it was easier to retweet than to do the blogs that I felt I couldn’t give my best to.  So now before I get to the email and blogs I have to investigate online for IPad air 2 keyboards and order the one I want.  I should just go to bed.  Ron made supper after he got up, we ate about 9 PM.  He felt I needed to eat and he made a wonderful pork steak with ranch dressing and seasonings.  He also made halved whole potatoes with dark mushroom gravy.  He added extra mushrooms as he knows I love them.  He has gone back to bed.     I have to do laundry in the morning so Ron can go back to bed, he works a three night shifts in a row.  Everyone know I love you and want to get to your blogs as soon as I can tomorrow afternoon.   Be well, be happy, be safe.   Hugs

 

January 22, 2017

Kellyanne Conway finally admits the audit was just an excuse – Vox

Filed under: Asshole / Jerk, Harm, History, My Life and Rants, News, Pictures, Political, Questions — Scottie @ 15:47

So now we know he is an outright liar.   He is not only a liar, but he also has no concern for the moral convictions of his religious supporters who claim he is the best one to be president.   He doesn’t care about norms.  He is basically telling kids it is better to lie and get what you want than to tell the truth and maybe lose.  If it is not OK for your children to lie to you, why is it ok for tRump to lie to the country.  What a unfit person to hold the office.   Hugs.

Source: Kellyanne Conway finally admits the audit was just an excuse – Vox

January 20, 2017

Record the fall

Filed under: Harm, History, My Life and Rants, News — Scottie @ 12:38

The dark ages have begun.  The fall of mankind and of our once great country begins.  Record it.  Record the struggle we all face to hold on to decency, to civil rights, to honest discourse.  Hold tight to those dreams you once held, and fight to keep the dreams we all had.   Saddened hugs.  

January 12, 2017

Melted Candle

Filed under: Ideas, My Life and Rants, Pictures, Things I like — Scottie @ 12:03

I am burning one of the candles I made and it melted down into a weird and wonderful shape.   I thought I would practice my photography using it.   I took some with the flash on, and some with the flash off.   Hope you enjoy them.  Hugs

Dragon box and ornaments

Filed under: Ideas, Love, My Life and Rants, Pictures, Talent, Thanks, Things I like — Scottie @ 12:00

We have a grand friend who is supremely talented and creative.   He has a wonderful way of making things.   He made me a cane and toy box for me, and he carved a plaque for Ron and I on our Marriage.   Today is the anniversary of our legal marriage and he sent us these awesome handmade gifts.   I don’t know how he does these intricate pieces.   He must have the world’s steadiest hands and the deepest level of patients.    Please note the dragon box that we can put an LED light in.  Those dragons are carved out of the piece of wood that surrounds them.  They are not cut out and glued in, he did them from one piece.   The same for the ornaments.   I am stunned at such a great gift.  I would have ruined so much wood trying to even get part of them correct.   Our friend has skill.   Hugs

January 9, 2017

Doctor visit day, shots

Filed under: Health, My Life and Rants — Scottie @ 16:04

Hello everyone.  I was asked to keep a few people updated with my latest results when the doctor went over them with me.   This is the easiest way to tell a lot of people at one time.  If you would rather not hear about my current medical situation, please know you can skip this post and I won’t be upset at all.   In fact we were talking in the office and they felt my attitude when I come in was rather wonderful.  I don’t complain, I am reasonable, I am not into pity or sympathy seeking.   I am interested in their lives and what is going on with them.   I feel everyone has bad stuff in their life and they don’t need to be bludgeoned by mine also.  I could live my life making my pain and medical problems be my entire focus of life, or I can live my life making the grand happy things I experience the things I focus on.  I know my condition is only going to get worse, so why not take joy in the good things I have now.  For example I have a wonderful husband who treats me as a princess.  I have no responsibilities other than what I choose to have.  I have plenty of food, I have shelter, I have clothing, I have toys, I have internet, I have friends, I have my fur family of my cats.  Ron takes me anywhere I want to go, he handles all the things in my life that stresses me.   So why should I dwell on the bad when in truth I have it so good.

Now on to the doctors visit.  As I mentioned I finally got the X-Rays the doctor had been wanting me to get.  Turns out she explained I had fractured my left hip, I had avascular necrosis in my left hip with the head being compressed.  I had also damaged my knee and had fluid build up and arthritis.     Not sure what kind of arthritis.   I also had a deformed vertebrae with a damaged nerve and worsening arthritis.   So this is what the doctor wants me to do.  I now have to add another doctor to my list.  I was referred to an orthopedic surgeon.   My doctor wants to have me evaluated to have my hip replaced.   I think it far too early.  I know on my right hip which I also lost due to avascular necrosis, I was diagnosed with it in 1996.   I had a core decompression done and spent two and 1/2 years in a wheelchair to try to save the bone.  They found out core decompressions don’t work at all.  However they did not replace the right hip until the bone was entirely decayed.   So it was not until seven years later in 2004 that I got a total hip replacement on my right leg.  I figured I would have some more years left to go but she wants me evaluated now.   I have to have a MRI on the knee to let the new Orthopedic doctor know what to tell me to do.  The spine I don’t know what they are going to do, I am not sure if they will want another x-ray set on that.   She said she would leave it up to the new doctor.   I also got put on a new medication called cymbalta.  Cymbalta is one of Eli Lilly’s top-selling drugs, used for treating depression, anxiety, and bone and muscle pain.  I was thinking of a PRN medication to take as needed but she wanted me on it full time, twice a day.  It also will help with my fibromyalgia.  Now as to the shots I get.  I think I got 18 this time.  I say 18 because I lost count but was still getting them after I counted 16.    I just don’t know how many after that.  My doctor forgot to tell me the number and I forgot to ask.   I felt relief within 15 minutes.   So poor Ron who had worked three 12 hour night shifts in a row, came home and got 2 hours sleep then had to take me to the doctors.  He slept in the van while I was seen.   Then as he usually does he took me out for lunch to sort of make up for the pain of the shots.   So I feel better, full for a while, and Ron is in bed until five when I have to get him.  The shot will cause me to be hungry for a few days.   I have to get all new blood work and urine tests tomorrow morning, and then see my primary care on Thursday the 12th.   Hugs

 

 

December 28, 2016

The Congressional Budget Office has some bad news for Obamacare repealers – Vox

Filed under: Harm, Health, My Life and Rants, News, Political, Questions — Scottie @ 19:28

The republican ideas of medical coverage for the less than wealthy will result in either financial ruin or no health care.   Take someone like me.  I have existing conditions.   I have great medical needs.  I just found out I will require a hip replacement some time on my left leg.  I will also need the replacement already done on the right one redone as they wear out and are good for only a limited time.  I am already well beyond what I was promised.   I am not alone.  People here in Florida are mostly older people.  We need hips, knees, and other things replaced.   That doesn’t even start to deal with my spine.  Because hospitals and pharmaceutical companies get to over bill and charge prices no average person could pay out of pocket, we need insurance.  I will have to go on insulin, which can be expensive.  The insurance company already sent us a letter saying they won’t cover the only pill form medication I need to avoid shots.  The medications are over $800 dollars a month.  Our part was to be $300 dollars but we got a one time coupon to try it for three months making our part only $100 a month.  That was a one time deal.   It gave me hope, being poor took that hope away.   Greed on the part of every part of the medical care establishment is going to deny me coverage and treatment one way or the other.   IS this really what the Jesus followers wanted?  Is this really what the many poor Americans who voted for all the republicans  want?  To have a few some live great lives of comfort and luxury while the rest of us die in the streets, our homes if we can keep them, and fall dead at work because we just couldn’t afford to stop.    Hugs

aSource: The Congressional Budget Office has some bad news for Obamacare repealers – Vox

December 26, 2016

If anyone wants a response.

Filed under: Harm, Health, My Life and Rants — Scottie @ 18:56

Sorry I am ill again.  A fever of 101.6.   I am freezing wrapped in jackets and blankets.  I can not even stand the thought of food much less the sight of it.  I did get food for Ron before he went to work and I did manage before it got this bad to take care of other things in the house.  Before he left for work Ron demanded I go to bed.  I told him I would and then slid into my office.  I am determined to get through as many emails as I can before I have to go to bed.  Hugs to all.  Oh in case I did not mention it, you all are grand.  I love you all so much.  Hugs

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